Howdy and welcome to the world of Fred. If you don't know who Fred is, I feel sorry for you. Maybe your time here wont be wasted after all.
Read and enjoy. Or not, it's up to you.

The Critics Rave

Holy Wow! -> 03-15-05
Yes, I did indeed actually create content for this website. I'm sorry it took me so long to do so, but it could not be helped.
-- Nick

Yeah, Im still here -> 10-08-04
Not like I'll be writing any stories or anything. Keep hoping.
-- Nick

Not enough annoyances in your life? -> 09-03-04
Check out another derivative sound loop! Star Wars Themedcause that's what I could download quickly. this one is better.
Also, new email address.
-- Nick

Boredom strikes again -> 08-28-04
In an attempt to prove to myself that I'm not completly wasting my time by writing things, I decided to write a letter to the editor. Checked the misinformed opinion page, found someone who was wrong, and showed him up good in the local paper. I doubt you care, but at least I know not all my writings are a waste of time.
The original idiot
Pwned, second one down from the start.
Oh the irony that one of the kids he hates showed him up. This isn't a big deal, but I'm just bragging about my l33t writing skillz. Sure letters have nothing to do with short fiction, but whatever.
-- Nick

woo! -> 08-25-04
only 20 days gap this time. Anyhow, I'm in the process of hunting down new front page reviews. email them to the address below, and maybe I'll post it. Keep it to a paragraph, if you would.
-- Nick

Here comes the 30 day wall -> 08-20-04
And I don't have a story. I'm trying to get a story at least every 30 days, and it might not happen. Sorry.
-- Nick

A year of Fred! -> 07-23-04
This is the big day, when we celebrate the birthday of the fred stories, 365 days ago. Despite a massive content gap, it has been a decent year. Maybe next year will be even better. Also, i changed the footer to have sme new icons. Also, if you leave this page open, the MD5CRK thing wil run, increasing the relatively insignificant chance of me picking up $1000. Hey, you never know, right? It's all for a good cause, anyways. Making money for me, that is.
-- Nick

Content Alert!!! -> 07-22-04
Yes, it's true. Fred just got a new story. It's all coming back to me now, so look out.
-- Nick

Broken things -> 07-06-04
okay, i doubt anyone even uses it, but the RSS dealie is broken. IT's probably been down for a long time, but no one told me. I'll fix it right away.

***FIXED***
-- Nick

Welcome to the NEW SERVER -> 06-15-04
So yeah, as expected the system went down for a few days while we go to our new, even more improved host. I don't know why or how, but they are improved, apparently. So maybe now I'll write something. Nope.
-- Nick

More art for you! -> 06-03-04
So, I made up another image editing deal. It is for your qualit viewing!!!!!111oneone

Oh yeah.
-- Nick

Just to update anything... -> 05-20-04
Alright, so I haven't posted much lately. Too bad for you. You do get some quality artwork today.

Rejoice. I can color in photoshop! woo. I can also edit in as many CATS: as I like. he's such a cool guy, cats.
-- Nick

Content? We don't need no stinkin content -> 04-16-04
Zeff! I like your hidden link. Again, your code updates keep the site alive. everyone else, wonder in awe at what the secret admin section looks like. I tell you this: awesome.
Also, I managed to throw together a story and a news post in 30 minutes ON A eMac. This is not the most comfortable keyboard ever, I tell you. The story is rather short, but it makes me feel less guilty about this site.
Watch out, cause the new Games review portion of wackiness.org is coming up this weekend, I hope. then again, I have learned any date I type into a news post is at least a month or two early. So look for the Games portiong a few weeks ago.
-- Eternally Shamed

Secrets and Fixes -> 04-08-04
Everyone find the secret page. It's a secret. Hint There is no link to it anywhere on the internet.

Also: I fixed the fact that you could input any value that you wanted into the story_id variable and it'd just give you nothing if there was nothing for it. Now, a nifty little fourohfour page. See?
-- Zeffrim

New Button! -> 03-25-04
It's spiffy! It does things! It may bring us some insignificant amount of traffic! It's the MD5CRK button! It does something cool, with Linux and MD5 and a bunch of other nerd terms you don't want to hear about. Just ignore it, unless you care about such matters. Story wise, I hsould get some over spring break
-- Will Rough you in the village

Poster! -> 03-20-04
Thanks to the good people at Text image, Fred has spiffy ASCII art posters for his campaign!
Okay, it doesn't work in Safari. Sorry, Fix is coming...

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-- Nick.

Whoa! President! Fred? No! -> 03-19-04
Well, It is time. Fred has at last unveiled his presidential campaign. He is the most American of all canidates, the most inteligant, the most thoughtful, the most everything you could ever think of. Worried that when Bush is removed, you won't have anything to protest? Fred will not dissapoint you! Without fail everyone will be angered equally! I'll be following his campaign through months coming, so get the word out.
-- Nick

Okay, I lied -> 03-17-04
I'm not even done with the story yet. I started one, but it never came into existance. So I figure I'll make up here. Maybe I can pull a penny arcade and rant for many a paragraph. Meh, nope. I don't have it in me.
-- Nick

Morning to all -> 02-22-04
Hey there Fredophiles. I'm getting back on the internet now, so I should have a story in the next couple of days. Sorry for my dissaperance.
-- Niklaus

Less Typos Than Ever Before! -> 02-12-04
I actually spell checked this story BEFORE posting it, maybe only a few typos got by me this time. I bring you this update in honor of the season of love that we have stumbled upon. I've got some plans going for another special edition style Fred story in honor of the holiday for the romantically engaged (Ladies! This is your big chance! Quantites of myself are limited! Act now to avoid disapointment!) so watch yourself. Hopefully it will be done on time for a change.
-- Roo$ter (nick)

!!! -> 01-27-04
Greetings fair warriors. You have the great honor of two things. One, a story. Two, a story. This script allows me to update the front page without FTP. R0x0red. I've got plans to relase another huge PDF file in the somewhat near future, but don't count on it.
-- Nick "The Girl"

I will tell him -> 01-26-04
Ich Ist Vurhowen. Yeah. It works. I guess. Zeff has done quite the redo of all the underlying code of the site. I announce to the world, then, to rejoice. It even has a little name thing. Story again before the week is out.
-- Du? (Nick)

Reinhardt Would Be Proud -> 01-26-04
Admin section redone. None one but Nick will care. Posting an update because I can easily. So ha.
Will be adding an update limiter feature sometime tonight, most likely. Less updates will show up unless specified otherwise.
Someone tell me what else to code while I'm in the mood.

(This update edited via super editing scriptness. Everyone rejoice.)
-- Zweihundert Zuhälter (Zeff)

Really Simple Syndication -> 01-07-04
Anyone who knows what I am talking about shall rejoice. Pick up a copy of some kind of RSS reader. Mozilla Firebirders can pick up my personal favorite here. Many Bothans died to bring us this information. View the feed here. I find it cool in a geeky sort of way, and also because I was able to do it without Zeff's help for a change. Plus I worte a story in my rage.
-- Ich Ist Vurhowen (Nick)

Writings on the walls! -> 12-03-03
Well, I figured I would update the index for a change. 19 stories now exist. Overall, I'd say the story of Fred is moving along. Also, note a new e-mail address for me. Still filled with many a typo. New XXXXXL PDF file coming next update.
-- Deux cent dans le chat (Nick)

JavaScript -> 08-16-03
So I added a nifty little JavaScript deal which allows you to go to a page from the drop-down menu without having to actually click the submit button. Nifty I say, nifty!
-- Zeff

Content -> 08-15-03
Behold, a new story for your reading pleasure. Typos fixed.
-- Nick

Oops -> 08-11-03
I have accidentally overwritten Nick's update. It was something to the effect of: "Enjoy large PDF files? Well then you'll be happy to hear that Fred now has one of his own. Here is where you'll find it. Brought to you by the powers of OpenOffice."
Okay, enough destroying Nick's words.
Everyone will be pleased to know that thanks to the help of DylanBlitz of the phpFreaks.com Forums, I was able to fix the story numbering problem, and now everything should always display properly. Forever. ∞.
-- Zeff

Fixed -> 08-09-03
Fixed.
And I am working on getting it to work differently, so as to not to that all the time. If you happen to be Nick or just care for some odd reason, you can check the progress here.
-- Zeff

News! -> 08-09-03
Fred finally finishes article 11/15, SQL database needs fixing. Password can be changed, not that anyone else cares. Nice system you have made there. Also, I have some ideas for the first ever Fred Artwork contest, with majorly cool prizes with little to no cash value, but priceless bragging rights.
-- Nick

Updates of early the next day! -> 08-09-03
Fixed the admin password system to a little more stable system and it should now no longer be a blatant security hazard (having the password displayed in the URL and all (and we should change the password, Nick)). I did some other things too, but I don't know what.
-- Zeff

Updates of the day! -> 08-08-03
Guide repaired. Critical reviews added to index. Nick can tolerate the layout.
-- Nick

Fred has a layout! -> 08-08-03
It's true! I made Fred a new layout. If you don't like it, too bad. Unless you're Nick, then I guess I'll have to change it.
-- Zeff