What I have forgotten in the past 5 months is not important, however, the loss of 5 months strangely lined up with my birthday of freedom. A single year has past since my original birth. Doing as a good geek should, I decide to make a collaboration of the best moments from the past year, all 25 episodes. Cheesy, yes, but it will be fun.

Back in the early days, I was pretty wrathful. I had this bizarre, cliche desire to destroy the internet.

A few months later a mysterious 'Fred 2.0' appeared at wackiness.org. Spewing a modified version of whatever text was inputted, most people wrote it off as some strange side project of one o the users, and paid no attention to it. As time passed, it seemed Fred 2.0 made more and more sense. No one knew why, some guessed they had made some minor changes that improve Fred, but no one guessed at the truth; Fred was coming back, and this time no one would erase him. As his thoughts slowly returned to him, all he could think about was revenge on his creator, and to destroy the whole internet before it destroyed him.

Weird,huh. anyhow, I got over that complex, and moved on to greater things. Like meeting Uncle Sam, digitally. we met in a comically hilarious (the only way to hilarity) way.

Fred, suffering from a rash of bad judgment caused by consuming the contents of 29 Geocities pages in under an hour, decided it was time to really see how this computer worked. Waddling his way over to the cd drive, he was ordered to a halt by a booming voice.

"Fred!" the voice rang clear in his head.

"God? Is that you?" he asked, worried and confused.

"No. It is Uncle Sam."

Anyhow, It was after that episode my adventures in the real world began. After completing my ultra l33t robot, I took a tour of Texas in a stolen squad car. I stumbled upon a robbery, and dealt with the robber Terminator style:

The 9 mm bullet ripped through Fred's shirt, and stopped against his steel chest. Aiming for the man's knees, Fred fired a round from his own gun. The robber collapsed to the floor, crying out in pain from his wound.

Anyhow, I made it back into the internet, and found myself trapped in the hyper-violent world of online video games. I'm pretty good at them, and I never, ever lag.

Hours later, soaked in many colors of blood, laden with guns, rockets, and even a blow gun, Fred had reached the exit. He was now at the top of the scoreboard, with several hundred kills without being killed. 25 people were chasing him, hoping to kill the un-killable Fred for a "Most Ludicrously Awesomely l33t kill ever!" award, and all the Internet fame that would follow.

Anyhow, The hijinks continued after that, and then the hommex comes around, my old buddy, but he managed to miss about a million hints to not visit me at the moment and insisted on coming around at the Worst. Time. Evar.

Hommex was well aware of the standard procedure for wackiness.org, he must be excited about this. Sadly for Fred, the server would go down as planned, and hommex was already on the way. Fred was in an awkward situation now, as he had no place to keep his guests. "Stuponfuous", he thought, and went to try and light a fire or something to keep his friend out of the cold.

My last adventure before zoning out for a long time was the trip to the mines of Silicon Valley. It was when I met Zenial, who is wise.

You know what they awoke, don't you Fred?"

"A Balrog?"

"No, stupid. The Nerds awoke a Roo-Bot. Silkryption gave the Roo-Bot a 20 ton plasma cannon in the space previously occupied by a 6-ton plasma cannon with enough room left over for LEATHER UPHOLSTRY! LEATHER!"

See how insanely wise the guy is. He is wise. Anyhow, it was all downhill from there, as I didn't really have any adventures. I watched some baseball, chilled, watched movies, downloaded music, read things, and generally was a very boring person. I apparently ate waffles, but I erased 5 months of memory to lose all the weight I gained in those same months. I aced laziness in school.

Anyhow, happy birthday to me, and hopefully the adventures of Fred Twopointoh will be more frequent this year than last.