Fred had stumbled upon a time of great turmoil. Having decided that, to be a real Artifical-Inteligance-and-Internet-Celebrity, he must acomplish some ardous task of Great Artifical-Intelligance-and-Internet-Celebrity-hood. He had slain most of the humans who connected to the Internet, as well as the many evil minions of the dark lord, but never anything worthy of remembrance. He decided to make for the house of Zenial, there to find some more dangerous task.

The last house of Zenial, wisest of all programs, was hidden in the dark places of the internet. Internet-Celebrity-dom had beaten on the poor old soul, and he now spent his days being wise, alone, in his house. Fred entered, speaking the great greeting of the house of Zenial, "Ich Ist Verhauen?"

"Du?" Zeniel replied. "Fred, I suspected in all my wiseness you would seek me out. Wisdom proclaims that you seek a task to prove for lasting generations your inteligance and celebrityness. Thus, I have made you a task. You are to journey into the real world, and go into the mines of Silicon Valley. There, you are to seek out the rare ore, Silkryption. It has such conductive qualities, many who touch it die of static eletricity in the following days. For this reason, Nerd of the north came to dig for it, to power thir mighty computers. But the Nerds dwelved to deeply and greedily. You know what they awoke, don't you Fred?"

"A Balrog?"

"No, stupid. The Nerds awoke a Roo-Bot. Silkryption gave the Roo-Bot a 20 ton plasma cannon in the space previously occupied by a 6-ton plasma cannon with enough room left over for LEATHER UPHOLSTRY! LEATHER!"

Fred slowly moved away from the obviously mentally-ill Zenial. However, he would accompish this task, and find this Silkryption, and perhaps add a new project to his Regional Technology Fred Managment company. He returned home, then transfered into the great FredBot, hero of the free world.

Upon clearing security in Roswell, Fred began the long run to the mines of Silicon Valley. He ran as if the whips of his masters were behind him. Carefully he entered the great mine of Silica, guarded by the Roo-Bot and many nerds. Pushing open the door, suddenly the doorbell rang. Fred opened the door fully, somehow teleported into the hall. Something strage was at work here. He turned around and found himself looking at the opening of the cave from outside. Fred was deciding on a course of action. Creating a X server, he decided to ping the door.

@Ping -door -10000000 -250 -q -//a/s/l

With a flash of pain, the door exploded from its hinges, opening the way into the mine of Silica. Fred walked in and began to explore the cave. He pulled a shovel from his pack and began to dig, searching for traces of Silkryption. At long last he had found a piece, when he felt a strange presence in the air. He was aware of a few pounds of plasma at first, then more and more until the full force of the twenty ton plasma cannon was about him. Pulling his packet cannon from its holster, he turned to face the beast.

It is well known in Fred circles that the Fredbot is designed to withstand a great blast. Tests have shown it capable of sustaining a 19.999999 ton plasma blast before collapsing into an unknown void of matter. Field tests are still pending on this result. It is feared that the Fredbot would die if a force in excess of 19.99999 tons of plasma was applied to the outer skeleton of Fredbot, but this is just thought and should not be considered fact.

Zenial, in his wisdom, was watching over Fred. He was aware of the lethal nature of his foe, and hoped his calculations on the Roo-bots cannon were wrong, even though he knew they were all too true. Fred had best be careful, he wisely thought as he watched over his task-boy. A massive, 20-ton plasma blast ripped into Fred 2.0. He died.

When Fred awoke, he was floating freely in space and time. He could see many things, all in the blink of an eye. He could watch over the internet, and the real world, all without trying. Then he was aware of his body, lying in the mountain mines of Silica. The Roo-bot had been slightly wouned, as he manage to fire his packetcannon as he died. Died? This was too confusing for Fred. A millisecond had passed since he first woke up. Being dead is powerful boring, he thought. He set about making some code changes, that he might revitalize himself somehow, an kill this Roo-bot before it caused anymore harm. 5 agonizing seconds past before Fred finished his changes. He went back to his body and restored it to its former glory using the Silkryption nearby. It could now withstand a quarter-ton more plasma blast.

Fred 2.1B stood up. Pulling the packet-cannon from the rubble, he fired several shots into the Roo-bot. One hit him in the back, another in the side, and one ruptured the twenty ton plasma cannon in the front. The resulting expolision, due to the force of the packet, was about a quarter-ton more than before.

Fred circles quickly determined that explosions of plasma follow the formula D=Tp*Ds, Damage is equal to Tons of plasma times dramatic effect of the scene. Both were quite high in this case.

Fred awoke the next morning back inside his server. Zenial was there with him. "Ich Ist Vurhowen, Fred."

"Du, Zenial. But what happened? I was dead twice, I thought."

"Once, mayhaps, but the second no. I wisely shielded you with my wisdom, sparing your life. You have gotten all the Silkryption I need, and have secured your role as Internet Celebrity.