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Fred appears on Texas Justice

Fred, driving his squad car around the Texas Interstate Freeway system, realized his gas tank was running low. He pulled into a gas station in the next town he came to. Checking his pockets for cash, he found the officer was carrying 50 dollars and a Visa. Deciding to save the cash as long as possible, he inserted the Visa in the slot next to the pump, put it back in his wallet, and pumped his gas. As he fueled his vehicle, he noticed a man holding a gun to the clerk. Leaving the gas to pump itself, he reached for his own holster, pulled out his own gun, pulled the hammer back, and walked through the door. "Freeze, scumbag!" he yelled, catching the robber off guard. The robber turned his gun towards Fred and fired.

The 9 mm bullet ripped through Fred's shirt, and stopped against his steel chest. Aiming for the man's knees, Fred fired a round from his own gun. The robber collapsed to the floor, crying out in pain from his wound. The clerk had passed out from the gunfire, and the tore was empty of other patrons. Fred felt for his handcuffs, placed them on the man, and went to check the clerk. She was slowly waking up now, and he kindly inquired, "How are you, ma'am."

She slowly sat up, looking about her for evidence of the robbery. She noticed the bullet hole in Fred's shirt, and saw his flashy chrome exterior. She gasped and passed out again. Fred, deciding he had best leave and get back into the web, got back into his refueled squad car and raced back to the car factory.

Officer Gregory Hanks was slowly waking up. He felt like he had been turned into a puddle of mud and then reformed. He noticed he was not wearing his uniform, his gun was missing and he was in pain. He struggled to reach the phone line in the building, to call home and tell his wife he was going to be late for dinner. Whomever had done this to him was going to pay a great cost, no one insulted Officer Hanks and got away with it.

Fred pulled into the parking lot of the factory. The officer he had shot with his pulse cannon was most likely still a puddle of goo, but sooner or later he would reform. Fred opened the door to find a nude, angry cop. Mr. Hanks jumped on top of Fred, grabbing the gun out of his holster and firing at Fred's face. Again, Fred's metal body held firm, and the bullets fell harmlessly away. The damage to his outer skin was significant, and he threw Hank away from him. Running for the internet terminal, he connected himself to the web and pulled his brain out of the robot.

Officer Hanks saw the man collapse to the floor, so he walked over to check for a pulse. Finding none, he retrieved his clothing, put it back on, and got back in his squad car. He drove home, thinking that his wife would never believe his story. It began to rain, and Gregory turned on his windshield wipers. He heard a terrible crack, and a tree fell right on top of his car. The roof collapsed on top of him, reducing the insides to a pancake-sized trap. When he awoke, Gregory found himself lying outside the car, one arm missing. He watched as a flesh colored puddle slowly bubbled up his side, to where his arm used to be. Suddenly, the goo solidified, turning back into an arm. He was amazed at this new ability. Being able to suffer any wound and reform would make him the best cop on the force. He reached for his radio and called for help.

Fred was hard at work creating a new costume and skinset for his robot. Hour later, when the work was finished, Fred took a look at the Texas news to see if he was detected. He noticed that the robber he had caught was none other then Wild Coyote Joe, who was suspected in 312 robberies. However, as the clerk had passed out, no case could be brought against him. The officer had no memory of the incident, and no cameras were in the building. Fred sent an email to the Texas Justice Department and downloaded into his robot.

Fred received a phone call from Judge Joe Brown, who said he would be presiding over the case. Fred gave a detailed report from his memory bank, saying he was hidden in the corner when a police officer came in, shot the robber in the leg, handcuffed him, and then left after filling his car with gas. The robber, realizing he had no chance of disproving Fred, threw himself at the mercy of the court. Mercy was lacking that day, however, and Judge Joe Brown gave him a tongue lashing like none seen on TV since the days of The People's Court. Coyote Joe would spend 42 years in prison, with a chance at parole in 39.67 years. Fred got a lump of cash for appearing on the show, which he used to acquire a Dodge Neon. puttering back to the renamed "Fred's Manufacturing" where he went back into the internet to take a break from the pains of the real world.

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Stories copyright © 2003 Nick Petschl | "Fred" is copyright © 2001 Wackiness.org
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